The Mother of Thanksgiving

“I hate Thanksgiving,” my five-year old daughter shared with me. “I don’t like turkey and I don’t want to eat it.” As much as I love history, I realized I had not done a good job teaching my children about our country and its origins.

“Thanksgiving is about a lot more than turkey. Do you know why we celebrate it?”

“It’s about the Indians getting food. They planted beans and the beans turned into fish. The fish swam through the dirt and the Indians had a feast.”

“What about the pilgrims?” I asked.

My daughter gave me the ‘stupid mom’ look, “The pilgrims are old people who sailed around on ships and didn’t have any food. Then Squanto gave them food and they had a feast.”

My husband and I looked at each other. We were speechless and frankly too tired from the day to add any corrections. I asked my four year old what she thought.

“Thanksgiving is about dressing up for the Indians and making cards.” I smiled, happy to know that our preschool tuition checks were erring on the politically correct side of the Pilgrim/Indian equation.

I mulled over what I knew about Thanksgiving and realized it wasn’t much more than my kids’ knowledge. I kept thinking about the famous Thanksgiving ‘feast’ paintings. I don’t remember seeing any women in them. They were probably too exhausted from plucking and roasting those wild fowls to pose for any formal documentation.

After a bit of historical snooping, I still did not uncover any famous female Indians or Pilgrims. However, I did encounter Sarah Hale, the woman responsible for our national Thanksgiving holiday. Everyone credits President Lincoln for that effort, which is partially true. He did sign the proclamation in 1863. But, it’s not like Honest Abe woke up one morning and said, ‘Mary, I think we need to standardize Thanksgiving and give everyone in America the day off to eat, drink and gain five pounds before the Christmas season.’ That was Sarah Hale, a mother of five children and the writer of the song “Mary Had a Little Lamb.”

Sarah was also editor of the number one women’s magazine of her time, Godey’s Lady Book, and used this platform to lobby for over fifteen years for a national holiday on the last Thursday of each November (FDR changed it to the fourth Thursday of November). During the Civil War, Sarah felt it was especially important for the country to share a day of thanks. She wrote, “If the germ of good feeling be ever so deeply buried under 'the cares, and riches, and pleasures of this life,' it may be brought out by sympathy and vivified by culture and effort.”

Thanks to my post-partum brain, I’m not sure exactly what those well-strung words mean, but I get the gist of it. Thanksgiving is a day to think outside of our comfort zone, give thanks for what we have and make an effort on both fronts. I think most women have the effort quotient covered since we are usually the ones who make the necessary plans for carrying on the traditions. It’s the additional effort that always fascinates me--how Sarah Hale managed to raise five children, edit a magazine and lobby for a national holiday seems truly extraordinary.

This year, my Thanksgiving Day’s efforts have consisted of making a reservation at a nearby restaurant for our turkey, fish and bean feast. (I am storing my energies for the holiday season that follows--two birthdays, Hanukkah and Christmas.) I will, however, be changing my Thanksgiving grace and dinner conversation with my kids. Not only am I going to give thanks for my family and our many blessings, I am also going to bow my head for mothers like Sarah Hale, Marie Curie, and Anne Lindbergh who devoted their time and energy to the common good. They served beyond the normal call of duty and for that I am truly thankful.